At first, the grief overwhelms you. But with time and tears, you can transform your pain into remembrance. And with that act, you illuminate the person you lost, allowing others to experience the beauty of their spirit….So they live on. ~Kelly S. Buckley~ Each…
Anxiety has, at times, crippled me. But it has also illuminated what I value most in my life. It has humbled me but also given me an opportunity to look inward and rediscover my strength and wisdom. I am accepting of my life as perfectly imperfect, and each morning, I can honestly sayI start the day still believing in the possibility and magic of life.
I want to celebrate the women I’ve met via email, sitting at my laptop, writing through pain, wondering if anyone was out there. They wrote to me from their darkness, and I replied to them from mine. We ruminated and lamented, we encouraged and consoled. Most of all, we discovered that as women, embracing the broken mess was what made us beautiful.
We stumble, we fall. Sometimes we absolutely shatter into a million pieces. But, as women do, we dust ourselves off and we stand up and continue the journey. Because that is what women do. We recognize that we are part of something larger than ourselves, and the strength of our shared stories and experiences moves us and the world forward. We look for the lessons in loss and we search for understanding and meaning.
Most of all, we discovered that as women, embracing the broken mess was what made us beautiful
These are turbulent times. I find when I hear five or six sound bites on the news about the state of the city, country or planet and all that needs to be fixed, I feel like a very small ant at a very big picnic. A speck of sand in the desert. I just don’t feel like I can make a difference when I see a cumulative report in a thirty-minute news program. How could I possibly make a difference?
The answer? Person to person.
Your garden is like life. It has a balance of things in there, some good, and some not so nice. But they balance each other. The good and the bad, they need each other. And the key to enjoying your garden or your life is living in the middle, not at either side of the spectrum. You have to balance the good and the bad too and see that each one has a place and a purpose.
Your garden shows you how to achieve your dreams. You plant the seeds at the beginning of the season, apply the necessary nutrients for growth. Then? You simply hope and believe it all works out, and the rest of the work is covered. You just know you will be picking tomatoes and peppers from those plants in no time right? You don’t over-analyze, you simply have faith. You go back each day to see little sprouts and then plants. Then, as if by magic, you walk by a plant and see it is weighed down with its harvest, waiting for you to take it. It’s like it magically appeared overnight.
We are bereaved mothers. We have buried our babies. There is no timeline, there is no explanation that we owe to anyone for our silence. We are carrying our children in our hearts, we are making peace each and every day with the loss of dreams, potential and promise. We work each and every day to put one foot in front of the other.
I’m sorry if we do that quietly, instead of having a unfiltered stream of consciousness and flight of ideas. We are quiet, and thoughtful. We are forever broken.
If we really want to Make America Great Again, we need to be able to sit together in that silence, in that pain. It is in that space that we can learn from our losses, and love each other instead of tearing each other down.
I’ve been pondering the division that we all see and feel in our world. There are so many conversations about the differences between us and who should assume blame for the issues we are facing.
It reminded me of something I wrote on July 23, 2009. 19 days after my son had died, I was shattered, hanging onto life one breath at a time. My life was in pieces at my feet.
There is a clarity in grief. Life is stripped bare, and you are presented with an opportunity to see life for what is really is, if you are willing to look with open eyes and an open heart.
Progress is impossible without change. Those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything. ~ George Bernard Shaw ~ If you are part of the JOLT family, you know that our Wednesday thought of the day asks “What Can YOU Do” to help another….
We are not as fortunate as the milk. The bottom of your foot does not bear an expiration date.
None of us knows when it will be our time to go. Unlike the milk, the future is not as certain for us. It could come after many years of living, or it could come tomorrow as we mow the lawn.
That is why we must live each moment like it was our last.
I know I’m not alone. Sunday’s news from Orlando just gutted me. I feel numb. I am feel angry. I am just pissed off about some of the exhausting social media rhetoric that has been trending for the past 48 hours. But mostly, I just…
Kelly is a source of strength… a powerhouse of motivation. Her incentive to find daily happiness in Just One Little Thing is life changing.
Arlene Scott, Eastern Health
I recently had the pleasure of interviewing Kelly as one of our experts on The Art Of Happiness After Loss Summit. Kelly’s warmth and genuine compassion for fellow grievers endeared her to many of our listeners’ hearts, as she not only shared her story but…
Lois McCullough, WOW For Now
I continue to give Kelly’s books to people I meet/counsel, anyone traveling through life seeking a ‘purpose..a reason’ just to live everyday. The book has become a welcomed and useful gift! Kelly’s books provide a ‘go to resource’ in my counseling practice. I use her…
Patricia Schlough, NCC,LPC,LCPC,EAGALA Advanced Certified Equine Therapist
After attending Kelly’s presentation on the ‘JOLT’ movement, I was instantly motivated to look for the small things in life that mean the most. It’s amazing how being appreciative for ‘just one little thing’ a day really opens your eyes to look for the positivity…
Karan Nijhawan, Category Technician at Husky Energy
I have read Kelly’s books and while I was saddened by her story of loss I was inspired by her resilience and her ability to share her experience so openly. I also feel privileged to have heard her speak to our Rotary club last year….
Andrea Stack, MBA, FCSI
It was fantastic to work with Kelly. Hearing your story has given our group something to think about in our workplace and how we interact with the families that cross our doors. It is important to know the impact of a gesture or a word…
Kim Pike, Nurse Manager, Eastern Health
